Let’s just tick off some the chaos, shall we?
Husband takes a wrong step and feels a muscle pull in his calf. After several days of manly chest pounding pain resistance, stoically soldiering on at work in the face of discomfort when he could barely put any weight on the leg without whimpering, he finally caved and went to the doctor when his calf turned a delightful kaleidoscope of purple, green and red.
Turns out he ruptured one of the muscles entirely and severely tore two others. Doctor says stay off the leg, keep it elevated and iced. How long you might ask? Six weeks or more, depending on how well he follows orders.
Vacation was scheduled for next week. In Disney.
The day after we went to the doctor, a speed sensor on the brakes in the minivan imploded, causing the ABS brakes to go into DANGER WILL ROBINSON!! mode, vibrating frantically under my feet, lighting up the dashboard with a cacophony of light and sound. I didn’t know the minivan could be emotive. At least I know there’s nothing wrong with the warning system.
Two days ago the frames of my glasses fell apart while I was cooking. The ear piece just randomly popped off and almost landed in the sheperd's pie I was making. I took them to the eye fixer upper place and of course they couldn’t fix it but suggested a lovely set of replacement frames for two hundred bucks. I fixed it with $1.89 super glue.
The vacuum cleaner brush just randomly stopped rotating and will not restart no matter how many times, or how hard, I kick it. I wonder if I can fix that with super glue.
The last wind storm? Finished the destruction of the awning that is no longer on the back of the house. It is pieces.
You know what I think? That we have GREMLINS.
Like this guy.
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| photo courtesy of warner brothers and the internet |
That’s really the only explanation I can come up with. Unless it’s all been an alcohol fueled hallucination. Last time I checked though, SuperHubby’s leg was still purple, green and swollen, and the booze level in the house indicates I haven’t been drinking nearly enough for hallucinations, so I’m back to Gremlins. Or someone dropping acid in my tea in an effort to deliberately push me over the edge.
Vacation plans have changed more than once in the past week in a frenzied how, where, who and will it cost a small fortune search by my sofa restricted industrious husband. It became a challenge for him to find a cost effective vacation that he cannot participate in. He’s alleviating his boredom with travel plans and watching the entire Soprano’s series.
Vacation plans have changed more than once in the past week in a frenzied how, where, who and will it cost a small fortune search by my sofa restricted industrious husband. It became a challenge for him to find a cost effective vacation that he cannot participate in. He’s alleviating his boredom with travel plans and watching the entire Soprano’s series.
It’s our daughter’s thirteenth birthday next week and we were going to celebrate that day in her favorite place on earth, Disney. My guy carefully planned this vacation months ago, down to restaurant reservations and Disney park visits. It was going to be an epic birthday/family vacation. And then April rolled around. Luckily, the Gremlins overlooked vacation plan details and we were able to cancel those plans without penalties.
Initially SuperHubby wanted me and kids to go without him, but the 15 year old said he wasn’t going on vacation and leaving his crippled father alone. His words, but it’s nice to know he’d give up vacation without a moment’s hesitation. That instant reaction, without thought or hesitation showed that his heart, always so open and caring, remains true and strong.
Finally, all said and done, plans are in place.
Husband and son are staying home. Together. Alone.
Giggles and I are going on a 5 day Caribbean Carnival cruise. Just us girls. This is going to rock so hard. SuperHubby hooked us up with a big surprise for the girl during the cruise that will absolutely thrill her.
Needless to say, since those plans were finalized, it’s been a whirlwind of laundry, shopping to stock the guys up for the week we’re away, cooking so they have frozen stuff to reheat, cleaning so the house is acceptable upon my departure and last minute errands that my husband usually runs but can’t. And packing because we’re leaving for Florida in two days.
I’m afraid of what the house will look like when I get back after leaving my partially broken husband and teenage son alone for a week.
But I’m not going to think about that at all when I’m romping in a cruise ship pool with my laughing daughter, celebrating her thirteenth birthday.
That said, if I find that Gremlin, I'm going to beat him with a giant sledgehammer anyway.
4 comments:
Just make sure you don't send said Gremlin this way. Be careful and have a blast with that little beauty of yours. Wish I was going with you!
I don't think a single one of my kids would forgo a vacation to Disney (or anywhere) becuase one of us couldn't go! So you are lucky there-and I hope all concerned have a wonderful time!
*I find it hilarious that my word verification for this comment was shneebe, because that us the perfect name for a gremlin!*
Have Fun.
That's a pretty sweet son you have there...And a pretty awesome husband! Hope you and Giggles are having a much-deserved blast :)
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