Respecting the Volunteer

When I post here about a topic that gets my panties in a twist, we all I know I'm ranting to the world in general, right? Most of the time - I truly can't say none of the time because I'm a little hot headed and passionate about things dammit! - most of the time I never get up in someones face to call them an asshole or fucking stupid or that they don't know dick about the subject they're spouting off on. Except the few times I've been really drunk and/or the person totally deserved it for being a completely ignorant fucktard. Even when the belligerent drunk man pissed on the floor in the biography section of the bookstore I managed years ago, I never once called him a fucking moron to his face. I did chase his drunken dumb ass out of my store with sharp words of rebuke but held back the profanities until after I delivered him into the waiting hands of security. Why did I refrain from unleashing a wellspring of profanity upon his head? Because at some point I left my adolescence behind and started pretending to be a grown up (Shhh, I KNOW I'm only pretending.) and the revelation came that cursing at people when I disagree with them doesn't help solve issues. It is gratifying at times but is unproductive when trying to deliver a cohesive viewpoint. Plus I can always load the story with tons of vicious insults and expletives in the retelling to SuperHubby. He gets hot when I'm passionately fueling my expletives.
The past two weeks have been a revelation as to the abhorrent behavior displayed by select parents of kids on SuperHubby's fall baseball team. Now, we've been in this league for seven years now and have seen serious behaviors that should never be displayed by rational adults but competitive sports seem to bring out the worst in people. I'll never understand what prompts a parent to verbally abuse the VOLUNTEER coaches of sports team's on which their children are currently active.
Even though I've heard similar stories, I was still shocked that the mother of a teenage boy on SuperHubby's team thought it would be acceptable to vent her spleen by calling my husband an asshole to his face and state that he didn't know a fucking thing about baseball. All because her son is in a batting slump and he is not the star starter of the team. Which she expects him to be, of course. What was SuperHubby thinking not giving her kid all the playing time she felt he deserved? Oh I know, he was giving the kids who've just moved up to this division a chance to practice their skills and gain some confidence by letting them try new positions and get more chances at bat and pitching. So they would learn something and feel good about their efforts. What a horrible coach he is, that SuperHubby, trying to build up these boy's confidences. It was to be all about her son.
Or it was supposed to be all about the other boy who's father wanted his son to be the star pitcher even though he could barely get the ball over the mound consistently. Who then called my husband a dictator and lousy manager for not seeing that his son should be starting every game on the mound.
All of this in a two week period. It's enough to make a volunteer wonder what the whole point is in offering your time. Now all of us parent's whose children participate on sports team's have disagreed with how coach utilize our kids. Just last year, I so disagreed with how Ace's coach handled him and a few of the other kids that I had to stop watching the games from their bleachers. This was to prevent myself from behaving like the other irrational parents and start telling the coach what I thought of his behavior. I was able to recognize that he was the Coach and it was his time he was volunteering (which is a whole other story as he didn't really spend much time with the kids at all) and who was I to tell him he was doing it wrong. I just ranted at SuperHubby who sighed and pretended to listen while thinking about the Mets in his head.
I have to wonder how these kids feel when they know their parents have acted like enormous jerkwads and embarrassed themselves beyond repair. What example does a child learn when their parents feel they deserve preferential treatment and are willing to be abusive to obtain same? If my child behaved in that manner, there would be serious hell to pay. I know Ace would be so pissed off he'd tell me to stay away from his games if I ever acted out that way. Which makes me wonder what this woman is thinking when she leaves her kid on the team and then sits and watches each game after being such a monster bitch to the man who is VOLUNTEERING his time to coach her son and has never been anything but polite and respectful to her. Really? What was she thinking?
I don't know if I could coach the kid unbiased after that, but my husband is a better person than I and doesn't treat this kid any differently. The Mother? He'll be polite but for the most part disregard her presence around the field. Part of me wants to get all bitchy back to this woman who so maligned my man, but he's perfectly capable of stripping her bare with a few calm choice words. It's a trait of his that makes me crazy. I'm not above some mean glances and snarky comments however.
As for other nutjob, he decided to remove his kid from the team. For which the rest of the team is grateful. He's been finding it difficult to get his son on another team because he has a reputation of being a complete fucknut. It's a shame for his son but in all honesty, that apple didn't fall far from the tree based on observed behavior from this parent. So I guess the lessons being learned there are pretty clear.

The coaches of a little league sport coaches for a few reasons, or at least the ones I know and respect do, and those reasons are the kids and the sport itself. My men LOVE baseball and it's a great way to for them to spend time enjoying the sport together. Plus, SuperHubby loves to see a not so confident kid take that leap and become a good ball player, whether it's his son or someone else's does not matter. He has a reputation in this little league for being able to develop the kids with less visible skills and turning them into hitters. Plus he's a coach who coaches ALL of the kids, not just his own son. Everybody plays. And isn't that what youth sport leagues should be all about?